December 28, 2004

resolution, shcmresolution...

Another year, another batch of resolutions. Yes, I am one of those people. I did fine with last year's. I lost 20 pounds, and have been much more active. This year I am going a little more in depth...and a little more specific. So here, in what could possibly be my snooziest blog ever, my new years resolutions:
1) Lose that last 15 pounds
2) drop my BF percentage by 7 points (yes, I will still be comfortably in the healthy range for a female my age)
3) be more honest...this is a little more about my attempts to "protect" people. And about this blog. There's a lot of stuff I don't put here, because I'm afraid of who might be reading it. If it's not out there, it can't be discussed...and that just doesn't do any good.
4) Get our financial situmation under control. Read: get rid of our crappy debt. I know we will still have our mortgage, and G's student loans...but everything else, we are paying off.

And I could say I will drink less in 2005, but who am I kidding.

Posted by raven at 05:42 PM | Comments (0)

December 27, 2004

It's been a long December

and there's reason to believe, maybe this year will be better than the last.

Sine I was working roughly eighty hours a week all summer, I didn't really feel like summer happened. It felt like I missed part of the year, and the next thing I knew I was eyeball to eyeball with the winter holidays. Usually I am wicked prepared for said holidays. I have my Yule candle ready to light, my presents are purchased and wrapped, the cards are off in the mail, and I am packing for whichever family's place we are headed for.

This year, not so much. I was (for me) frantically last minute shopping the week before Christmas. I actually purchased my last present on christmas eve eve. Seriously.

Granted, G and I weren't going to exchange gifts, but I found something super-cool minutes before he was going to meet me to get something to eat. So, I went back for it. And he liked it, and got me a cool gift, so all was well. Anyway, My cards and last package didn't get sent until Wednesday night. Late Wednesday night. We didn't go anywhere, because my request for time off was turned down. And I found my Yule candle on Thursday. (Yule was tuesday). So, a little behind. I did put the tree up, though since we were going to be home. I am enjoying having the tree up. It's artificial (so far that tree has cost me $4 a year), 6 feet tall, and this year I believe we are up to 800 lights. I am a light freak, and add some each year. According to the directions, I should have 2-300 lights. Hmmmm....I just can't imagine that. I also decided that next year, I want to have several trees, each with a different theme. In the office, it will be the Batman/Star Wars tree, the kitchen will be Coca-cola, the living room will stay the same and house the Wizard of Oz and Gone with the Wind, and I don't know what the dining room and bedroom will be yet. A friend recommended an S&M tree for the bedroom. I haven't eliminated that possibility.

There was a work party. It was fun. I apparently pissed off a co-worker's girlfriend (who is also a co-worker) by dancing with him and five other people. In a circle. Not touching. Right. Pretty good time, despite that.

I managed to host a little get-together. I had accumulated some wine, so I invited a handful of ladies over to drink said wine. It was a wonderful evening. Low-key, with lots of good food and wine. I've been in such a funk, it was good to have some peeps over. It was also a good mix of people, and intimate, which was a nice break from all the hubub. I'll have to do it again soon.

The next night was the big theatre party. I had to work until late, but I still managed to get all gussied up and go. I wore the dress that I chose and purchased for my friend Troll's wedding. I love the dress, but it is very formal, so not a lot of chances to wear it. It was nice to get dressed up. Unfortunately (or maybe fortunately) I was told by more than one person that I looked just like the Princess Diaries. I've never seen the film, and even after looking at stills online, I don't get it, but whatever. I had fun overall. The end of the night was weird, though. The brief version: I was drunk, BIL was drunk, pissiness ensued, I wanted to just get everything out on the tabe, he not so much, we had it out for a bit, a friend mediated, he eventually left, and she being the mediator that she is, drew out all this emotional crap that I have been holding onto. It was good to get the stuff out, it all happened that way for a reason, but it was a weird way for it to happen.

Worked a crapload. Can't wait to not work retail anymore. It makes one dislike humans too much. Either that or all the bad seeds manage to find me. I'll spare you the details. Suffice it to say, I can't figure out how htese people manage to get out of their houses each day, much less find their way inside stores.

I am still pondering why it is necessary to keep covering Christmas classics and fucking them up. Hearing said songs over and over for over a month, I have had a lot of time to really grasp how awful these covers are. GAH!!

We celebrated Christmas eve with family that we rarely see. G's grandmother, aunt, cousin and cousin's SO. I was wary, but we had a very nice time. I think the wine, cheese and treats helped it along. Christmas day was super low key. I felt pretty crappy, so I lounged in my PJs all day. We had grand plans of going to Postle's big bash, but even after several ibuprofen, I felt crappy. So, instead we watched Love Actually (my gift from my cat--he's a hopless romantic), Big Fish and chilled.

And here we are, eyeball to eyeball with the new year. I feel like this last year was filled with a whole lotta nuthin.' So, this next year has to offer more than nothing, right? But, that's something else for a different day.

Posted by raven at 06:18 PM | Comments (0)

December 16, 2004


Yet again...
These guys are cute...but happy? Not so sure...

Posted by raven at 06:13 PM | Comments (0)

Two entirely different things, people...

Strict. Strick. Two different things. I am guessing that when you say you are trying to be strick on your diet, or strick with disciplining your dog, that what you really mean is strict. Strick would be a bunch of hackled flax prepared for drawing into slivers. That really does not make any sense does it?

What is sad to me is that one of the people who is guilty of this is a writer. As in her sole income comes from writing books. I would think that she would think more about what she is trying to convey, and do so correctly.

Sorry, pet peeve of mine. Had to get it out. I am sure that there is plenty more word abuse where that came from, but that is the one I keep seeing. From more than one person. WTF?

I feel slightly better now.

Posted by raven at 11:58 AM | Comments (0)

December 13, 2004

Digression #367

So, friday was a sort of marathon day. I felt like I was going, going, going, but I felt no sense of accomplishment. My therapist might say I'm being too hard on myself. I say I'm being perfectly reasonable.

Anyhow, I started the day with my annual physical. I don't know why, but I always seem to schedule these things first thing in the morning. I don't know why I think it's a good idea. Once I'm there, in the stirrups, I wonder why I didn't just sleep in. I did get new birth control (seasonale, so I only get visits from Aunt Flo four times a year---whoohoo), some cream to put on my hands since they get so gross in the winter, and I am back on meds for my depression/anxiety/etc. This will be medication number four. I really hope this one takes. The other three took, then stopped working. Fourth time's a charm, right?

I then got my eye's checked, and ordered glasses. Red ones. First time in my life. I will mostly just wear them driving, but it will be an adjustment, nonetheless. I get them later this week...I hope I like them. They was some pricey mo-fos. Eventually I am going to get some crazy contacts, but with the cost of my new bc*, they will have to wait...*sigh*.

I did get to chat with my favorite sis for a bit after my appts. Then met G for lunchy-munchies. I had high hopes for working out, but felt exhausted, so I napped for longer than I meant to. Then, was pissed at myself for not working out. We also went to a show on Friday. I'm leaving that alone for now. Must very carefully calculate my thoughts. We finished the day with late-night dinner at Perkins, and our usual try-to-solve all the problems of the world chit-chat. This night it wasn't anything too-mind boggling, just shite that should just slide off our backs, but instead we get all worked up. I'm sure I'll make mention of the discussion...just carefully calculating when and how to phrase things, based on some of the people who find their way here. (and I'm probably not talking about you, so relax).

Whew...I was feeling more ambitious when I started. Now, I just want to throw my laundry in the dryer, and sleep. That alarm always goes off too early for me.

*Can I just say how ridiculous I think the prices are for prescriptions? I have decent prescription coverage, but some things aren't covered, or are so expensive that I still pay a lot. G pays a crapload just for stuff to keep him alive. I won't even get started on that tangent. I realize that R&D has its cost. However, we also have to pay for all those freaking commercials (not cheap) and all those fucking pens and post-its and calculators and every other ridiculous piece of crap that the drug companies are handing out to make people want their drugs, or to get drs. to prescribe what they're peddling. Seriously. I get even more pissed off that nothing is done to destroy the root of the problem. Let's just keep putting band-aids on the big, gaping wound. The problem isn't who pays, it's that the cost is so fucking high. And hmmm, other countries don't charge so much. I wonder how they manage that? We certainly can't do that. What, keep our people healthy? That's crazy talk.

Posted by raven at 11:48 PM | Comments (0)

December 07, 2004

More turkey, Mr. Chandler?

Imagine you are reading this in November. Imagine that I didn't wait until the leftovers were polished or stored.

We had a lovely Thanksgiving, considering it was our first without heading to someone else's place to celebrate. We decided to make it an all day event, starting with brunch, and continuing to dinner. We had a small turnout, but that's kept the stress level low. No panic attacks, since we were ready in time. Although, I do have to admit, I was finishing making the placemats while watching the parade on TV. In my defense, it was because I had worked 8 days straight and T-day was my first day off.

Anyway, brunch was simple...bagels, cream cheese, mimosas, fruit. Bernie and Tanja showed up with homemade caramel pecan rolls (so yummy! Thanks guys!). Then, LaLa had to show up with one-hundred euros (I had to spell that out) worth of french desserts and pastries from the Sofitel. That translates into $118 dollars worth. To clarify, she's a travel agent, and used a gift certificate she earned. They were amazing...beautiful tiramisus, creme brulee, berry tarts, a berry torte, cream puffs, some sort of mousey cakey things...drool. If I would have known...that would have been all we had. I could have easily spent the day gorging on them. I wish I would have thought to take a picture of them...they were gorgeous. Thanks LaLa! We made Turkey, cranberry sauce (real stuff, not from a can), mashed potatoes, maple-vanilla-clove sweet potatoes, BIL brought stuffing, rolls and we baked a pumpkin pie.

Everyone always asks why we bothered with a pie, when we had all those wonderful desserts. Well, G needs his traditional pumpkin pie. LaLa has a STRONG aversion to all things pumpkin. Hence, we had to provide the pumpkin treat. Las did have to take some home to her hubby. I hope he liked it!

We ended the night by watching Love Actually. If you haven't seen the movie...see it. Makes me cry like a little baby, repeatedly, every time. So, so good. And lots of eye candy.

It was a good day, and I was very proud of making most of a Thanksgiving dinner, mostly from scratch. I even had a pretty table, used our good crystal for the first time since we received it, and had everything in pretty serving dishes. I felt so Martha Stewart.

The day after Thanksgiving, I had grand delusions of getting up and out by 6 in the morning to go get a scrapbooking tote for half off. We instead got up at the crack of three. In the afternoon. We didn't leave the house until it was time to go to our friends' wine and cheese party. It was a nice little get together, and for the second day in a row, I ate wayyyy too much. It was good though. Well worth it.

On Sunday, I went back on Phase One. I've put a few pounds on, which since I hadn't hit my goal weight, I was pissy. That, and I still have one pair of pants in my closet that I can't quite wear yet. So, I am plugging away. Less than one week left. I am also hitting the gym again. My problem area is my legs and butt, so I am looking to work those a little extra. That is so hard for me, since when I work my upper body, I see results right away. It takes forever to see anything on my lower body, so I tend to give up on it. I have to not do that. I want to be able to, at least once, walk into Ground Zero in as little as the girl who runs the bondage show or the one dancer who can get away with wearing a thong and look fabulous. I could get away with it with my trusty danskin fishnets that seem to camo everything, but that just seems like cheating, you know? At least I can look back on where I was at this time last year (standing outside Lane Bryant at THE mall and realizing that while plenty of people shop there, and they have lovely clothes, I would rather stand there in my too tight sweats than go in, not to mention the fact that I had zero energy, and zero self esteem at that point), and know that I will never be in that place again.

Whew...that was much longer than I intended. I am way behind on my day, and have a long list ahead of me. I am going to finish my Hot Topic wish list (not that that's a hint or anything) and get cracking on that pile of laundry that is once again taking over the house.

Posted by raven at 03:32 PM | Comments (0)

December 03, 2004

The List

So...I was going to post my T-day retrospective, but then the cat that hates me decided to curl up in my lap for 40 minutes, put me way behind, and now, if I don't get to the gym soon...there will be no going to the gym.

So, instead, I will post something that was put into print for the first time today. It's not laminated, mind you, so I reserve the right to update at any time.

So here is my boy list:
1) Billy Corgan
2) Christian Bale
3) Ty Pennington
4) Chris Martin
5) Robin Finck

I only know of four on G's list, but I approve of them all...and would totally put it here, but I think that's his right. And, i totally know he will put that in the comments.

Couple list:
1) Monica Bellucci and Lambert Wilson
2) Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt
3) Marilyn Manson and Dita Von Teese

Eventually I will recap t-day. Not to be confused with z-day.

Posted by raven at 03:48 PM | Comments (0)